In this World, I will Fall in Love with You a Second Time - Chapter 32

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As soon as I woke up, my phone vibrated and displayed a new message notification.

[You okay?]

It was from the same kind friend I have, whether it be in the past or in the present.

“Kanata…”

I, however, was unable to find the right words to reply to him. After abusing the backspace key for a while, I finally decided to send a short reply.

[I have something to ask. Are you free today?]

[I have plans with Hina today so that’s a no. What about tomorrow? In the same park?]

Reading the almost instantaneous reply, I muttered “Tomorrow hmm…”

To be honest, I wanted to meet him as soon as I can – and think about what I can do.

However, Kanata has his own life and—

I don’t want to be the one who ruins it for him.

[Thanks. See you tomorrow, then.]

After I sent the message, I locked my phone and placed it away while my eyes drifted to my desk.

The desk where Arata’s diary was.

I tried my best to be tough in front of Kanata but… to read everything that happened last night again…

I was not strong enough for that. 

In the end, I decided to have a relaxing Saturday, doing nothing but laze around without laying a single finger on the diary.

And then…

“Asahi!”

“Miyuki. Sorry, calling you on a Sunday…”

“What are you saying?! I would have been mad if you hadn’t called me.”

“Thanks…”

It was Sunday.

Miyuki and I headed to the park where I was supposed to meet Kanata.

“Oh, you’re already here!” [O-matase]

“I was just on time… so you called Miyuki too, huh,” he exclaimed.

“Of course she did! What made you think she’d want to see you without me here?”

“That’s not really what I meant…”

Looking at the two of them bicker made my heart grow lighter.

It felt like Arata would cut in at any time, telling them “what are you two even doing…”, as if his death was nothing but a bad dream.

If only that were the case.

“Sorry Kanata, for calling you out on a weekend. Do you have plans with Hina today as well?” I asked.

“Nope. Nothing at all. And me too, by the way. Sorry about yesterday. There was—”

“Don’t worry about it. It’s natural that you’d put Hina first after all,” I stopped him from going any further before turning my gaze to Miyuki. “Hey, Miyuki. From your memories… When did Arata and I break up…?”

“Hmm… March, during our third year of middle school but…”

“But?”

“If I’m not mistaken, the two of you broke up for some time before that. I’m not exactly sure when but Arata told me about it. However you two went back to the way you used to be in no time so…”

“Do you remember when that was?!” 

Hearing what Miyuki said, I unconsciously raised my voice.

She shot me a look, asking me to calm down before falling into thought once again. A few moments later, Miyuki…

“I guess not… Sorry. Can’t remember. All I can recall is that you lovebirds weren’t even distant from each other at all.”

“Oh… Thanks.”

It was a memory that had never existed between the two of us — a memory of the new past.

“Kanata, you messaged me because your diary changed, didn’t you?”

“A part of it, to be exact. BUT! I felt like I wrote that because we had an argument about his illness.”

“I wonder… What should I do to make him tell me about it?”

As I muttered that, Miyuki and Kanata’s expressions hardened before we all fell into silence.

“It’s… gonna be difficult, probably.”

“Kanata?” 

Carefully picking his words, Kanata said, “That guy… at that time, the thing he hated most was making others cry because of him. His parents were already having a hard time because of him and now…”

“Arata…”

“That’s why… You won’t hear anything from him because it’ll just increase the number of people being burdened by him.”

Kanata’s face turned to that of sorrow as he finished his sentence as though he was thinking about Arata.

I know what he’s saying. I understand that but still!

“Even so! I still have to! I have to know… so we can move forward and face it together!”

“Asahi…”

“Whether he’s a burden or not doesn’t matter. It’s better than losing him forever…”

“Asahi… You… really are strong.”

Hearing him say that, the dream world’s Kanata’s words flashed through my mind.

And so, I immediately rebuked him—

 “I am not!”

“Eh?”

“I’m not as strong as you think,” I continued. “To be honest, I’m scared. Knowing that I can lose him at any time or that I have to see him suffer through that illness… I get terrified.”

Even now, I’m still too scared to open the diary. What a weak-willed person I am.

The future that I should have had together with Arata disappearing… 

The thought of that shakes me to the core even now.

“Then…”

“But the most painful thing was seeing him lying in that coffin. That’s why it doesn’t matter if we had a fight over it. After all, having an argument that makes him hate me won’t kill us, would it?”

“You…” both of them exclaimed with a troubled face.

“Hmm? Did I say something weird?” I asked them.

“I’m done… Miyuki, do something about her,” Kanata said to Miyuki.

“This… Only Arata can stop her now,” she replied.

“Right? He should take responsibility for this.”

“W,what are you two talking about?” unable to understand their conversation, I asked them once again.

The two of them, however, just gave me a look that says ‘not telling!’.

(I don’t think I said anything too weird, though…)

“Well, it’s fine, I guess. It’s not like I can’t understand you. So!” Kanata turned to me once more.

“Huh?”

“I have a plan!”

“A… plan?”

“If it’s him, I’m sure that this will work,” Kanata said, his face riddled with sadness.

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